Monday, July 19, 2010

Change Comes From Within... And Sometimes, The Outside Can Influence It.

So, how I am to better what I am now? How can I enhance me? What would be the best way to better myself, and actually quit living in this fucked up world that I somehow made, molded, and sealed in concrete and steel? I don't know, but I think today was the best way to do it, by trying something new. I don't expect it to stick or anything, but I have a new nickname, that I actually like... I plan on molding something new around it... without allowing it to change me on the inside. How can I harness and control the dreams of wild, and allow them to flourish? Easy! I just have to find a way to open up the flood gates slowly, and control the flow of creativity, and allow myself to be happy with whoever the fuck I am suppose to be. Its not that hard, its just gonna require a change, and a little bit more hard work swimming back upstream. Its time where I stop making excuses, and actually just GO! I hate stepping over people, and I hate it when people step over me, but its going to come down to where I just have to watch out for me, and not allow bullshitters to continue to bullshit there thoughts into me. I gotta strengthen myself mentally, and spiritually. I have to get better for me, and for the ones that I love. They deserve the best that I have, and I deserve to give them the best that I do have, and what I can be. What does that entell? I don't know! I just know that once I work on me, the changes will be evident. If not to me, definitely to you. You, as a friend, deserve my best, and I will give you my best, even if I don't get it from you. :) So, here's to change, and how scary, and awesome, and wonderful, and liberating that it can be. I love you.

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