So, my Twin found happiness, and I could not be any happier! For her safety, she will be known to you as Twin. To me, she is the best thing in my world. And no, I do not have a flesh and blood twin. My friend and I met back in high school, lost touch, regain touch, and been really close since. She lives in Canada, and its very few and far between we actually see each other, but, we know our relationship, and I am there for her, like she is there for me. I recently told her that if her now boyfriend somehow breaks her heart, he has a brand new enemy. No matter where I am, I will find a way to fuck up his world. There is very few things that you do to get me pissed... But the one thing that gets me upset is when you fuck with my family... And trust me, my family is HUGE... But yeah, anyways, on to the subject at hand...
I recently told someone that I am done with love... I am done with the search, the hope, and everything that has to do with dating, and love.... There is a huge and complete difference between the levels of love, There is man and man, man and self, man and nature, man and God... And in that "man and man" love, there is definitely degrees in that. I have a lot of great friends, who I love to death... Like I always say to all my favorite people, "Thank you for allowing me to fall in love with you." I love all my friends, and all my relationships with those people. Recently, I met my friend Christina's boyfriend. As long as me and Christina have been friends, she has talked about Mike. Never met him, until recently, when I realize that our paths, me and Mike that is, have crossed years before! Small world, and the smaller city. Anyway, I love them! They are awesome, and I am blessed to have them in my life.
But when it comes to love, and passing on my name, I think it stops with me... Like I mentioned in a previous blog, it definitely requires some things that someone has to live up to in order to be considered, at the least, look-at-able... So, I am done, and I have said so before, but this time, I am for real. Do I have hope that I am wrong? Yes! God knows that the one thing I definitely want is to have a family of my own. However, I don't want to do it the wrong way. I believe in the order of things... Meet, date, ask, plan, wed, sex, baby, repeat steps 6 and 7 as many times as you want, do more 6 than 7, provide, nurture, let go, wed off, grand kids, get older, and die. But in today's world, that will NEVER happen. Why? Because more and more people are coming out of the closet (not a problem, but its definitely a trend), social media have set boundaries around meeting someone in real life, all we do is keep up with whats going on with the lives of others as we sit across from someone who may have a problem that you need to deal with, AND, the big one, porn is so easy to access! Seriously... you can turn to your left, there is tits and dicks, you turn to your left, pussy and assholes! It's no reason why no one wants to get married... Its too easy to get what you want without moving from your chair, all the while stuffing your face with Doritos! Not to mention everyone who finds satisfaction in making someone else's life as miserable as possible with limitations of self, and worth.
Love, somehow, is not what you have in common, or what you don't have in common... It's now all about what you did/didn't do on the Facebook or the twitter, or the whatever... My year off of the social media sites is almost up, and I can tell you it has been awesome... The people I met, the bands that I love now, the memories that I kept to myself has been more than what I could have thought... And because of all the encounters that I manage to have with these people, I have fallen in love ten-fold. The missed connections, the new addition to my world, it has been awesome. But finding someone to love for the purpose of a life of happiness, It stops. But if it finds me, cool. If it doesn't I am cool with that too. No need for me to rush into anything. Plus, I have me to take care of. I love me, but there are a lot of things to correct, and a huge margin of time to improve me. Can't wait! Except, I have to wait til this pollen passes for me to do what I really wanna do. Ok. Done. Night.