What Is The Right Hand Doing?

Tricks and illusions. We all fall for the lies presented to us every day... Last year, early fall, there was a woman standing on a street corner, with a baby in a stroller, and a sign that said "Homeless, hungry, and with child, please help, God bless." Now, I have lived in this city so long that I have seen the tricks from low lives, trying to capitalize off of hard working 9 to 5'ers. However, this one, I was willing to fall for. Do I know how it ended up for that young lady? Nope. I do hope that it worked out for her, even if it wasn't true.

Tonight, while at dinner with my friend Rachel, she was in the mood for war. Behind her in the next booth, there were some mid-20 somethings that were being really loud for no apparent reason. Watching her face would have been the price of admission for your favorite concert. It was amazing! But she was visibly uncomfortable with all their loudness behind her. They ended up leaving a short time later, but then her attention went to the bar, and she was watching your a-typical doucher talk to some girl who was drunk... She was telling me what was going on, because my angle was blocked by a few heads at the end of the bar we were sitting. Apparently Doucher McAsshole was groping Suzzie Loosepanties. He then put something down her shirt, and that is where Rachel really got uncomfortable. She was already ready to fight, but I talked her off the ledge. It was entertaining to watch. 

So after the encounter she witnessed, she asked: "Why do we fall for the assholes?" Talking about girls, clearly. I said, its because y'all fall for their tricks! The bad guy always gets the pretty girl, because they just know how to play the game, and you are willing to play it. Simple. The reason why guys like Doucher McAsshole gets the pretty, tall, big titted, big ass girl with the great smile and hair is because, she fell for the tricks. The same can happen to guys as well... Girls are just as big of a player than guys. Girls are just as heartless when it comes to things like getting what you want for the night.Girls can flirt relentlessly for just a drink. And as soon as you go in for a kiss, or something, said girl suddenly sobers up, and leaves with her bitch friends...  It is not all men, and its not all women, but the majority of the minority makes it so entertaining, and maddening to watch them take advantage of each other. But, this is why we fall in love with magicians.

To keep from falling for the tricks, the easiest thing to do is to just know where you are, know who you are with, and its ok to say no, and its for damn sure ok to walk away. You know what else is ok? Literally going out to have a good time. No one will ever fault you for hanging out with no one but yourself. Speaking of, I was pleasantly surprised on Saturday to see as many friends as I did at the Classixx show. It was amazing, and I saw one of my favorite up and coming bands "GEMS." I had such a good time. As long as my week has been (Going off subject and just bullshitting right now... bear with me), my body had my back... My body said to me "Dude... cut loose, and drink the night away... you earned it, and you deserve it." I put them down!!! It was AWESOME, and I left with new friends, and respect for musicians. GREAT time was had... I said all of that to say this... Go out and have a great time by yourself every now and then. You'd be surprised who will show up. So, instead of trying to get someone to sleep with you, or dance with your friend to get attention from a guy... just have fun! Life is too short to do so much  peacocking to get 5 mins of attention. 

Night

That One Moment...

For someone who does not believe in love, why is sex something he cherishes? Not too sure of why, but What happened last night was nothing short of a miracle... Last night, I went to a concert. I saw the band, "St. Vincent" play at The Tabernacle. It was amazing! I wish I saw her more than once when she came through town, but, I am glad that I finally got to see such an amazing guitarist, a very funny young lady, and someone who just has talent oozing out of those dreamy eyes of hers. Probably the hottest woman in music. Seriously! But I digress... At the end of the show, and with a fight with the asshole sound guy to get the set list, to which the light lady, give me hers, I was heading to the exit when a 5 foot something, brunette girl started talking to me. She needed my help to find her friend Natasha.

She described Natasha as a "Jamaican girl, with Jamaican hair, black skin, wearing a brown shirt, and black boots, and has Chinese eyes." And as we stood there... I actually stood there, and she wobbled... She was 5772 sheets to the wind... I was told that the earlier expression that I heard/said was wrong, so now I just make it up! But yeah... anyways, after she called for Natasha, we walked down to the front of the building. She grabbed my arm, and we waited out front for a second. She then said: "Can you walk me to my hotel, its right there, and Natasha would probably be into you, blah blah blah." Mind you, I am more sober than a pole. I did not have any alcohol. "We have champagne, and weed, and you could have your way with me, or her... I don't know what you're into." Yeah, shes giving me all the signs that she was willing to get any she could... She's a very attractive young lady as well.

Anyways, we walk pass the building and I offer her a ride to the hotel, but, she wanted to walk. and just before we got to the car, we witnessed an accident in the parking lot... she was trying to run away by climbing over the fence where the buses were. I talked her down and saved the security guy a lot of walking. We waited for a little while, when her bladder started to give her problems, so we walked to the hotel. I carried her a little bit, threshold style, but, she wanted a piggy back ride... That wouldn't have worked, because she was wearing a little black dress, and she was stumbling in heels. We missed a turn, but after we got her back, we finally made it to the hotel, and after a little fight with the technology, she got into the bathroom with no more issues... Or at least I thought...

So after she used the restroom, she bumped and banged around a bit in there... What do you expect with a drunk girl? She came out, and she got in the bed... I went and sat in the opposite bed... While I was there, she looked at me, and in that toothy grin of hers, she said, come closer... I switched from the opposite bed, to hers... she said, "closer!" To where I leaned in... She then asked me to "caress" her. If there was ever a more obvious sign that a girl wanted to have an added moment of bad judgement, this was it... So I obliged... I caressed her, by running my finger down her arm like I was turning off a switch. I knew that wasn't what she wanted, but I was not going to take advantage of someone who is from out of town, and drunk off her ass... So after a little about a minute or so, she says "I'll be back." She got up, walked to the bathroom, fell, and was lifeless... Right now, it doesn't look good, especially with her roommates coming in at any time... she passed out. so, I took her "77 lbs." body and moved it to the bed, talking to her to get some sort of response... I have dealt with something like this before... I finally got her to squeeze my hand, and she finally came back, with that look of death... You know, the look that things aren't staying where they are suppose to? Yeah, she was about to have a "reversal of fortune." I got her in the bathroom, and she decided to hang over the tub. I helped with her hair, and rubbed her back, as she was finishing up, I hear the door being played with. Thank GOD her friends showed up.

I open the door, and explained everything to the 3 friends that came in. They were grateful. Natasha is a very beautiful "Jamaican girl, with Jamaican hair, black skin, wearing a brown shirt, and black boots, and has Chinese eyes." So, after intros, and handshakes, and seeing that my new friend was in good hands, I was about to head out, when she asked me for a hug. to where I ended up threshold carrying her again and she kissed my cheek, I kissed hers, and she then said "Will you make out with me?" I politely declined. :) She was drinking water but, yeah, it was evident that she was beyond gone. I sat her down, and she started to lean back, and that floor would not make that headache in the morning feel any better if I did not catch her head, as she came down. Not only was I a gentleman, I saved a life, and the least I hope is that she appreciates me, even if she forgot that entire night. I said good-bye, and wished them all safe travels, and I went out, and had a few drinks to celebrate the fact that I am a mature man who knows right from wrong...

Things like that can test your ability to be a gentleman or an asshole... I can't say that the results would have been the same if I was drunk as well, but, I know that I didn't want to cause any more stress than she was probably feeling, due to a recent break-up. If I caressed her like she asked, that would have been a temporary solution to a bigger issue that she may have been facing. I do hope that she is ok, and will get better from this. Whoever said nice guys finished last, was CLEARLY thinking with their dick... Cause, I feel that I did something that may be paid forward one day. Not looking for a reward, just that I hope my actions goes far.

We Require A Blood Sample

Call me crazy, but, I think I have passed the want/need for love. A guy like me will probably never fall in love. Love is something that is always wanted, but always rejected. Now a days, there are so many hoops that a man has to go through to just be able to talk to a young lady... You have to be tall, dark, and handsome, you have to have a big dick, muscular, have a job, a place of your own, you own car, and be drama free, disease free, and drug free. Gotta love kids, gotta be family oriented, believe in God, and most importantly, you gotta be willing to work for a relationship that will possibly lead to marriage.

There are so much limitations of what you are suppose to look like, and have, that no one wants to love, just because. I honestly wonder how many good young men are left out in the cold, because they aren't anything that superficial TV watching bitches wants. Well, I know that I could be the greatest thing going. I'm working on myself, and slowly trying to improve... I'm 31, and doing my best to finish school, and start my career as either an editor or writer. So,  its just as impossible to just be a nice guy and try to get a nice girl. Some of these nice girls like to act as if they can control a bad boy, and before you know it, they are running back to you, crying about why "he" doesn't love them, or pays attention...

So, I just gave up! I know I have talked about it before, but now, I can honestly say, that I am done with the idea of dating. There are no women out there that knows what they want. Its nothing but girls out there with what they think is an idea of what they want in a "Boi." They don't want men, they want a boy that they can train... Perfect example: There is this young lady that I know from a seasonal gig I work... One night, the tour guide was always the last one through the door, a lot later than usual... Cause as a guide, you have to stay with the group. But this one kid, was always coming in, and going through the secret door to catch up with his group. Come to find out, the girl in the room before mines, was holding him up to just make out with him... The kid was 18, and she is 24... I confronted her and said "You gotta make him keep up with his group.... And she did this practically all night... We talked, of course as friends, and in the talks about it, she mentioned that you gotta find someone you can train... Makes since, I guess? But why are you allowing a group to fuck around, because you wanna make out with some... boy? Things I will NEVER get...

So, I just sit here gladly single... Do I believe in love? I do! Hell! We would not be here if it wasn't for either love or lust, right? Do I believe in love today? Well, with all the limitations that comes with what is considered for love... I can say, I don't. It can be hard to find someone. It can be even harder to put yourself out there for the D.A.P.S (dog and pony show). to make yourself available... But, all in all, the people who are out there that are looking for something real, are out there... The real question is, how willing am I to take myself out of my comfort zone and look for this person? I don't know if she is worth the search anymore... That's all. Sorry about the long pause... Life has been crazy!

I miss you, Ruby.

Yesterday, I missed my Grandmother... My Grandma Ruby passed away 4 years ago just before Thanksgiving, and it was not an easy day to say goodbye to her... But yesterday, while I was in a meeting at work, and also doing some stuff around the job, all I could think about is her laugh... Her laugh always put a smile on my face... My Grandma always had a way of letting you know that she was happy, which was more or less... always! The only time I saw my Grandmother cry was when we laid her final husband, known simply as Grandpa Charles, to rest some 20 or so years before. Other than that, she has always had a smile. She was a world traveler, and a joker. She was just the greatest...

For me to be in a family like that, just makes me happy to have been blessed by the love that is... Whats now becoming difficult is the way the family seems to be falling apart in some ways... One of my uncles isn't trying to sell the house, and seems to try to run us (my mom, aunt, and cousins that lives in GA) out/away, Another uncle selfishly died. Yeah. My Uncle Frank had all the means to be alive, but he didn't want to be, and kept the fact that he was really ill from the rest of the family... asshole. I do miss him. He was GREAT GREAT people, but to choose death over being there to walking your only daughter down the isle, or being there to dance with your only son's wife on their wedding day, or even be there to help raise your grand kids make it really hard for me to actually be willing to forgive the choice he made. My aunt, who I love, gave me such hell as a child that I lovingly stay away. Another aunt is just nuts... I mean, insane!! She speaks without thinking, and loves to make any good moment uncomfortable... And in all of that nutty stuff, only ones of us who actually try our damnedest to keep in touch is us cousins! Me, Kevin, Mike, Jenny, Kurtis, Kristen, McKenzie, and Mia all do a lot of talking between us. But other than that. nothing more... The family is falling apart it may seem, but, we are trying. A lot of unsuccessful attempts to actually get together and do some sort of vacation/weekend with just us. Hopefully really soon we can. But it is still difficult to see my family crumble.

Life has a funny way of making things come back to family... While thinking about my Grandma, I thought about the times at her house on Willow Street. The times me and my cousins would literally pile up on the floor and fight, or go out in the smallest back yard in the world, and play football, or cops and robbers, or kickball... It was always a good time. Every morning waking up and there is the scent of breakfast in the air, and plans to go shopping. My grandma LOVED to shop. After that, it was off to a restaurant. Then bed, then up on Sundays, and church where me and my mom LITERALLY would laugh at people and their hats and what not... :) Great times for sure. But, yeah... missing my grandma hasn't been this intense since after the funeral. Even in that day, we had a LOT of great laughs. I am pretty sure, that is exactly what Grandma wanted... for us to enjoy ourselves and out lives. :) Still missing you, Grandma. I will see you again, one day. 

Good Parents = Great Music Taste

When I become a parent, I will raise my kids right... 2 nights ago, a radio personality here in Atlanta, was telling the story about him going to Benihana here in Atlanta. And after he saw all the kids running around, he decided to go elsewhere... On Buzzfeed, there is an "article or something" that shows that "Tweens" don't know who the group Outkast is...  That right there is bad parenting... You should NEVER allow your kids to run around a restaurant, while yall get drunk... You should ALWAYS open your kids up to GREAT music from the past, so they too can appreciate GOOD, QUALITY music... But because of the way these kids are raised, they wanna listen to Drake... Kanye West... Lil Wayne... They always go to the shit, and will never discover Janelle Monae... The Coup... GEMS... Coheed And Cambria... Death... The Beatles... The White Stripes... TV On The Radio... GREAT bands like these are never going to get the mainstream attention that they deserve, because, parents do not know how to be parents...

My mom grew me up on Earth, Wind, and Fire, Issac Hayes, Aretha Franklin... Classic soul searching music... My mom for my first real Christmas gave me the gift that I still have to this day... An original pressing of Michael Jackson's Thriller... That same woman, about 8 or 9 years later took me to my very first concert... It was Paul McCartney. He came and played at Williams-Brice Stadium in Columbia, South Carolina, and that night changed my life... I realized the importance of good music. Good music does a hell of a lot more for you than the bullshit that they force feed you over the Radio... I do hope that people realize that "Royals" is a social commentary of the "privileged" lives of American Youth, and a girl who is HAPPY for the life that she has, and not trying to live a "dream." It's a great song! But, I do hope that people know that Lorde has more than one song, that is a hell of a lot better than "Royals." But of course, no one will ever try to look it up... Why? Parents.

I will make sure that my kids will know music going back all the way to the days of the Symphony. You have ALWAYS gotta find out why you love certain music. But it is so wrong for parents not to give their kids the option to find or discover good music. The Hackney boys (The band named 'Death') had parents that exposed them to EVERY type of music, and they are punk LEGENDS!!! 3 black boys, living in the middle of Motown, playing punk rock... THAT is good parenting... They came from a blue collared 2 parent home, and they made sure that they had faith, music, and family. But, now a days, those kids in the 80s that were all about the hair bands (not saying that they were bad, or all bad), they will just allow their kids to listen to anything, and its obvious. I dont know the science behind it, but I am pretty sure that the statistics would show that the better parents have a great taste in music... Just saying... So yeah. Kids. Music. Important! But as a side note, the shitty songs are fun for a reason... And happiness can be a drug.

Just Because...

You may or may not have read any of my previous blogs when I talked about my good friend Christina. If you haven't read them, go back and find them. She's a pretty great person. Anyway, I wanted to do something nice for her for the coming Christmas season, but, the original plan kinda fell through. So, I am thinking of just celebrating her for her thoughtfulness, insight, and just sheer awesomeness through blog and something a little more me and her (like dinner or something). 2013 has been pretty great communicating with her over the year, and I am so grateful and blessed to call her my friend.

We met around this time last year at a going away party for a mutual friend of ours. We didn't have the deepest conversation, but the little talk that we did have had me intrigued to befriend such wisdom. It wasn't until later in that year or earlier this year when we finally decided to actually hang out. Another mutual friend of ours was moving to San Francisco, and we talked in that loud bar, and laughed and discussed, and I left there happy to know that there is someone who was willing to just listen to my side of things... Someone there who would listen to my ramblings about life, music, sports, politics, whatever. Sometimes, we all just need someone to listen to our bullshit, ya know? :) So, maybe a month or so after the party, I got a hold of her, and asked if she wanted to meet for dinner or coffee or something. We ended up meeting for coffee, and we just sat there and ran the gambit of topics, going from current events, all the way to future plans. We just sat there for hours just talking and going on, and it was enlightening. The thing that I learned in that whole first conversation is that I am not wrong for what I think, as long as I am willing to hear the other side of the story. The little things we learn, right?

So, throughout the rest of the year, we have gotten together and talked and shared life's little joys and horrors, and laughed and talked, and even squeezed in a dinner, a movie AND a listening "party" for the new Janelle Monae album that was soon to release at the time. And in all of that, I have gotten the pleasure of getting to know such a beautiful, intelligent, amazing, and quiet soul. Christina has been so awesome to me over the year or so we have known each other, and the 9 or so months that we have been friends, that, I am just content in just letting the world know that people like her exists... We all need friends out there that has nothing to do with our personal lives. We all just need someone who is there and ready for a conversation or two, just whenever, and because. Now, with that said, I do hope and pray that our friendship will develop more and more, but, in due time, that will happen. But for right now, I will say this in closing:

Christina, thank you, from the bottom of my soul, for simply being there. Thanks for taking me and all my small annoyances, and passions. I have learned how to be more patient, and be a better listener by simply sitting across the table from you. I am blessed to have people like you in my world, and I am beyond thankful for the color you bring to the canvas that makes up me. Not sure if you know this or not, but, I look forward to our gatherings, and I hope that we can continue this long after we find our special someones and marry them, and have kids, and move on from here, to one day we find time just to catch up. :) You are a treasure to me, and this blog doesn't even scratch the surface of what would be appropriate as a proper thank you to you. But this will have to do for now.

Thank you, just because,

Your friend.

Jarrett Hayes a.k.a. Jolly Green

energy wasted poorly

Outside of everything that is happening in Miami with the whole "hazing/bullying" thing in sports, the next big story comes with the term and the name of a proud and historic franchise in Washington D.C. Apparently, their NAME is so racist, that the media, from your high school copier to your AJC and every newspaper in between, Saying "Redskin" is so so wrong... Even if it is wrong, why bring up this argument now? Why, all of a sudden should I be up in arms about a word that I associate with a football team? When I hear the word "Redskins, " I think about Doug Williams, George Rogers, The Hogettes, just simple football stuff, like the black man in full Indian headgear! Nothing screams racism when I hear the word "Redskins." But APPARENTLY its SO offensive that even Bob Costas himself will no longer refer to Washing as the mascot. To each his own. But, all of a sudden, this word is SO BAD! I mean, it is just wretched!!!And yet, ALL around suburbia, in every 12-32 year old white persons car, has your ::put name of your favorite bullshit rapper of today, including Kanye West::  CD, and NO ONE has any qualms about the word "nigger." Makes since...